I just finished this book, and to say that this book broke my heart would be an understatement. After waiting for what felt like forever, I finally read this book and now I'm at a loss for words.
If I forget the only thing that I still don't want to accept, I couldn't be happier with how the story turned out.
And my ships! Oh god, I've never been happier and sad at the same time. At one moment there'd be a swoon worthy scene between the characters, and right after that there will be something to ruin it. Kaz and Inej's scenes went from 0% chemistry to sizzling hot romance! And in any other book, I wouldn't even consider those scenes very romantic, but Kaz Brekker? He stole my heart with those gestures, which is exactly what Dirthyhands does in this entire book. Everything between them was so intense, and the sexual tension, I can't even. *inserts million heart emojis* And how could you not love him when he says things like these:
“I would have come for you. And if I couldn't walk, I'd crawl to you, and no matter how broken we were, we'd fight our way out together-knives drawn, pistols blazing. Because that's what we do. We never stop fighting.”
Wylan has always been one of my favorite characters, even though he was sort of side character in the first book. So when I got to know that there was also Wylan's pov included, I couldn't have been more excited! And there was so much of Wylan that we didn't know. That scared, shy Wylan was long gone. (this is what happens when you spend time with Jesper and Kaz) Even Jesper's character goes through a lot of development. Jesper was struggling with so much in his life: the gambling, his father, some secrets, but everything was handled amazingly. And the scenes between Jesper and Wylan? All I could do was either laugh or grin like an idiot at their cuteness!! These two make such an adorable pair!
“Wylan,” Jesper said, looking into the wide blue sky of his eyes, “I really hope we don’t die.”^^^ I've been hoping this since the beginning!
Now to Matthias and Nina. I loved their cute fights and cheesy lines. Unlike others, their relationship had started to grow ever since they encountered each other in the first book, and their journey has been beautiful.
“I am grateful you're alive", he said. "I am grateful that you're beside me. I am grateful that you're eating."
She rested her head on his shoulder.
"You're better that waffles, Matthias Helvar."
A small smile curled the Fjerdan's lips.
"Let's not say things we don't mean, my love.”
I also admire the bond between Nina and Inej. We rarely see friendship among the main female leads, and this book is filled with beautiful scenes between Nina and Inej. This is also the reason why I love this dulogy so much: Despite being so opposite of each other, this crew managed to come together and formed such beautiful bonds with each other.
My brave and beautiful characters! I am going to miss them so much!<3 You wonder why I didn't talk about the story? Because it doesn't matter. It was always about the character for me. And although the mission, the parem effects, and the deads were some really incredible addition to the story, I only cared for my six main characters. And I am still pretending THAT thing never happened. No. Not accepting that anytime soon. I think I'm getting this idea behind the red stained pages now :/ But not going to talk about that right now, because I still need to think over this book and get myself out of the emotional mess this book has left me in.
Just be ready for a lot of action and heartbreak.
Thank you, Leigh Bardugo, for the characters I will never forget, and for the most heartbreaking ending.
No mourners. No funerals.